The root itself becomes clearer as Ben begins therapy with Dr. Christine Morales. Ben was initially put in therapy after a struggle with addiction issues and mania combined, which culminated in his attempting to hold up a bank with a cell phone he pretended was a bomb. Although Ben's participation in therapy was mandated by the police, Ben adapts to therapy quickly, beginning an honest attempt to learn the reasons for the addictions, disorders, and obsessions that are slowly killing him. Yet as soon as he begins to dig into these issues, he finds himself overwhelmed by the strong emotions and confusion that flood through him.
It is clear that there is something that Ben can't bear to look at, something that has so shattered him that he has been forced to split his identity into two to keep himself feeling safe.
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He can't know what it is, but at the same time, his work in therapy causes him first to question and then to begin to dismantle the coping techniques he's developed his alter ego Georgie, his addictions, his lusting after impossible women. He finds himself so conflicted that he goes off his medications entirely at one point, deliberately if subconsciously inducing psychosis to avoid having to face the terrifying question: what it is that makes me act this way?
When he returns to his medication and emerges from the psychosis, he realizes he can no longer avoid confronting the true issue. His mother has been a taboo subject for him all these years, his relationship with her a corner of his psyche he keeps securely closed down. With the help of Dr.
C, he begins to process her abuse of him. He begins by relating the physical abuse she subjected him to then progresses to her emotionally abusive tendencies, but he is still strangely detached. Finally, on the brink of slipping once more into madness, he is able to remember the sexual abuse he suffered at her hands, the abuse that melded the concepts of arousal and repulsion in his brain, the abuse that left him yearning desperately for the love of a woman but unable to understand what healthy love might look like. With this knowledge, Ben can at last begin to confront his symptoms head-on and to hold out hope for a less troubled life.
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Loading may take as much as a minute if it hasn't been updated recently. RSS feeds Recently-added books jwharnisch's reviews Reviews of jwharnisch's books, not including jwharnisch's Helper badges. Member: jwharnisch Collections Your library 1, , Currently reading , To read , All collections 1, Reviews 1 review Tags story 1 , Book Review 1 , best books of 1 , feed me daily 1 , author 1 , short stories 1 , angst 1 , relationships 1 , writing 1 , favorite authors 1 — see all tags Media Book 1, , Paper Book 1, , Audiobook , Ebook 9 , Video Recording 30 , DVD 24 , VHS 6 , Other 24 , Software 1 Clouds tag cloud , author cloud , tag mirror About me Envision a blend of a mentally ill mind with unsurpassed resiliency and fiery intellect and your result would be the brilliant Jonathan W.
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For anyone who's ever been confused about the true workings of this vast field of inquiry, The Beginner's Guide to Astrology is a practical guide that makes available to everyone the wisdom of this perennial science. Includes illustrated study guide with glyphs, learning resources, and more.